Okay, so I'm nearing the home stretch. The new book has about 60 pages to go before the first draft is finished. But in those 60 pages, I have to completely destroy the character's life. And the lives of her family members, through the choices she makes.
I've noticed my page count dropping slightly per day, ever since I began to approach this final stretch. And then it hit me...I'm attached to my character. I don't want to ruin her life. I don't want to hurt her. But I have to, because of the bad decisions she's made.
All along, I intended for this story to end a certain way--the end was what I envisioned first. So I know it has to happen this way. Everything in the plot leads up to this ending. I've created the sort of inevitable train wreck you know is coming but can't turn away from.
Yet...I still kind of want to turn away.
Does this happen you guys, too? Have you ever created a character you enjoyed so much you didn't want to end the story, particularly in a way that harms the character?
This is a tragic story. Everything is in place for the tragic ending...the foreshadowing, the tone, the language. Now I'm dreading writing the tragedy because all the character had to do to avoid it was be smart. But I don't think she's smart in that particular way, so it wouldn't be true to the character to have her save the day instead of ruin it.
*sigh* On with the final few chapters...let's see what happens when my fingers hit the keys.
I had this affliction so bad, I didn't write anything for 20 years. So you re doing well at this point.
ReplyDelete